Great Cat Jokes

LOL with these great cat jokes! Got any of your own? Share!


What does a cat do when it gets mad? It has a hissy fit.

What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? The purrpatrator.

What happened when the cat went to the flea circus? He stole the whole show!

What is a cat's favourite colour? Purrrrrrrple!

Where does a cat go when it loses its tail? The retail store.
What does a cat like to eat on a hot day? A mice cream cone.

What do cats use to make coffee? A purrcolator.

What do you call a cat that has swallowed a duck? A duck filled fatty puss.

If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? Their paws.

Why is the cat so grouchy? Because he's in a bad mewd.

If there are ten cats on a boat and one jumps off, how many cats are left on the boat? None! They were copy cats.

Is it bad luck if a black cat follows you? That depends on whether you're a man or a mouse.

How does the cat get its own way? With friendly purrsuasion.

What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew.

What has more lives than a cat? A frog because it croaks every night.

What is a cat's favourite subject in school? HISStory.

What do cats like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.





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Funny Jokes: LOL with Elephants, Dogs and Frogs. But the Last is my Favorite!

Quick Jokes:

Why do ducks have flat feet?
To stamp out forest fires
Why do Elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks

Q:How can you tell if you have a stupid dog?
A: It chases parked cars!

Q: What do you do if you get eaten by an elephant?
A: Run around until you get pooped out!

Warning: Frog lovers do not read this one!

Q: What's red and green and goes 40 miles per hour?
A: A frog in a blender

The following is courtesy of doggiesparadise.com

A wife says to her husband one weekend morning, "We've got such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning." Her husband replies, "Well, lots of dogs can do that." The wife responded, "But we've never subscribed to any!"

A Long Joke:

As an elderly lady sat on her front porch reflecting on her long life, a Fairy Godmother suddenly appeared and offered to fulfill three wishes for her.

"Well," said the woman, "I guess I'd like to be rich."
POOF: The Fairy Godmother turned her rocking chair into solid gold.

"And I wouldn't mind being a young and beautiful princess."
POOF: The Fairy Godmother turned the old woman into an exquisite young princess, with a priceless crown of jewels.

"Your third wish?" asked the Fairy Godmother. "Could you possibly turn my wonderful dog into a handsome prince?"
POOF: There, in front stood the most handsome young man anyone had ever seen. She stared at him in awe, completely smitten.

As he came toward her, her knees weakened. He bent down, brushing his lips across her ear as he whispered, "I bet you are sorry you had me neutered."


What's your favorite animal joke????

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